what i want in life

"I Used to be Fat" is an awesome show! i have watched it the past two days but always have to leave at ten of so i get to class. not only does it promote good health but it promotes self confidence and motivation which is something everyone needs in their lives. it was heart warming to see the transformation that the 18 year old boy went through! makes me happy, especially to see others reach their goals. it makes me think about my goals and what i want to do with life.

1. be happy, even under the worst circumstances!
   it's so easy to get down about little things but in reality, we all have a lot to be happy about. we should look to those things and be positive about them.

2. make family and friends a priority.
   not that i dont do this....but its important to tell the ones in your life that are there for you that you love them and are thankful for them

3. be more self-motivated
4. have a better self confidence
5. love who i am
   all of these are so important! i dont even feel like i have to say why

6. workout!!
   once basketball over, the only person who will kick my butt will be me. i need to stay focused with it and make sure that i dont let myself go too far. my friend danielle told me last night that i looked really good, with a flat stomach. i havent had a flat stomach since freshman year so she definitely made me feel good. i know once basketball is over its going to be tough to get back into the swing of things but i want to do that and i dont want to drink beer all the time either. that's a big reason why the stomach hasnt been flat!

7. Love.
  love is a small word that means so much, it can touch ppl in a lot of different ways and it can change lives.

8. Save money!! $$$$$
   probably one of the hardest things for me because everyone knows i love to shop!


i think everyone should set goals for themselves and try to stick to them. goals help ppl be who they want to be and reach for something that might not have been there before.

this life

"This night is flawless, don't you let it go
I'm wonder-struck, dancing around all alone
I'll spend forever wondering if you knew
I was enchanted to meet you" Taylor Swift

taylor is so lucky...she can express exactly what she wants to say in lyrics that are so beautiful with so much truth. in our lives, i wonder how many ppl have something to say but never actually say it? i know for me there have been so many times that i just wanna say something out LOUD but i dont, i keep it to myself. i dont know if i am more afraid of someone's reaction or my own.
there have been many ppl, especially boys come in and out of my life that i never really got to say what i wanted to say to them. over the years i have been more open but i guess i was always more closed off in saying what i really wanted to and just said what they wanted to hear. my sophomore year i finally stood up for myself and said exactly what i wanted to say and i saw the impact it made. honesty is strange and hard to take, but it opens eyes more than anything and makes you think about situations, yourself, others and exactly what you are doing!

"And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day
And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed
We can plan for a change in weather and time
I never planned on you changing your mind" Taylor Swift

I always wonder if those guys, that were oh so important to me once in my life, ever think about me/us now? in my past i would usually let a guy take advantage of me and my kindness and do absolutely anything for him...and in return would just be let down and heart broken. then a couple weeks later i would hear from him, saying that they realize now what they lost. isnt that the worst thing a boy can say to you...."now i realize what i lost, i see now just how good you were to me."

i hate that line!!!

"So here's to everything, coming down to nothing
Here's to silence that cuts me to the core
Where is this going? Thought I knew for a minute
But I don't anymore" Taylor Swift

i think the most important thing of all, is through all the relationships i have been in, i know myself. and stay true to me, or atleast have since my last long relationship. i learned that you should never change for a guy, never alter a part of you to fit someone, because that guy should love you for who you are. he should love your imperfections and never want them to become perfect because they are what make you who you are!

and bottom line..it's all about having faith for that someday...and until then, just having FUN! :)

the same mind

do you have one of those friends that reads your mind and then when you are about to say it out loud they say it with you??? :)


i have one, and i wouldn't replace her for anyone. i met her going into my sophomore year of college. we were at basketball camp and she was a quiet freshman, just simply observing and taking in all the different personalities.


after camp i wrote on her facebook wall : hey babe! i am so glad i met you at camp! :) you fit in with our team so well and we're gonna have so much fun this year!


hahaha and i was right! we had so much fun. i think back to my sophomore year and just remember all the times that erin and i were together, doing anything or nothing but it all meant something. we grew so close and i knew that she was a friend that i would never be able to replace!

 each year we just get closer and closer. erin is a distinct individual with a drive unlike no other. she is passionate about the things she wants, she loves the people in her life, she would drop anything for anyone to help them and she is smart. she is caring, always willing to lend her shoulder for me, and she is unique-never caring about what others think. she brings out the best in me, and reminds me everyday that i matter. everyone deserves a friend that will do that for them!

 i <3 my best friend!!

You are unrepeatable.

My sister Brittany just sent me mail today. I opened it up and it was a magnet that said:

"You are unrepeatable. There is a magic about you that is all your own..."- D.M. Dellinger.

She said, Tuffy (my nickname) i saw this and thought of you. love, big sis.

my sister has always been a person that i look up to and admire. she is the smartest person i know, always had good grades, made good choices, set a good example, handles her money well, is out of control, high strung, loving, dramatic, childish, mature, beautiful, gutsy and grounded. she has knowledge about so many different things, things that i probably will never know anything about.

growing up we shared a room and like any two sisters that lived together, we fought over who's side was who's. or over when we went to bed or when we woke up, about clothing, music playing in the room ect. but we also got along. we were always there for each other and it was comforting to know i had her. when she went to college i loved the freedom of having my own room but once i got here it was nice to finally have a roommate again. after 4 years, i want to move to where my sister is. i just love her! and at the same time i sometimes want to strangle her but that's family love.

i am so excited because she is getting married in April! today i went and bought the bridal shower invitations. it's really special to be a part of her special day as the maid of honor. she is going to look beautiful on her wedding day...

i strive to be as great as my sister, even though we are completely different people we are very similar. sometimes i'll catch myself sounding like her or saying something she would say and i laugh. but like the quote, there is a magic about me and there is a magic about her. and even though we have similarities, it's our differences that make us special and unique.

i plan on speaking at her wedding and saying the quote from "In Her Shoes" the movie with Cameron Diaz.....

I carry your heart with me(i carry it in

by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) (E.E. Cummings)

Not trying to copy...but i just loved it :) and even though it's meant for brittany and miguel...i guess the truth is that i will always carry her heart in my heart cause she has helped me be who i am today and find my own magic**

love your family always!

i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done

dedication

what makes people more dedicated than others in life? I am in my 4th year of college basketball and my team has lost the past four games now in a row. how does one team go on a winning streak and the other go on a losing streak? what makes someone a winner rather than a loser? what if the person who loses really isn't a loser to begin with? maybe that person just has bad luck or circumstances are different for them. maybe they weren't recruited by a winning program but a program in need of wins. we play teams that are 15th in the nation and we keep up with them but come up short... what do they do that keeps them on top and us on bottom? people ask me what i am dedicated to or what i am passionate about and sometimes i say basketball, other times i say family, friends, music etc... so do the teams that are on top always 100% say "basketball" ? in high school too, my team never was the top dog but we did beat some top teams. but we didn't make any history that was left behind except for the history we remember ourselves. to me, that is enough. my years of basketball have taught me so much about things in life like the way to handle yourself, your leadership skills, and how to deal with wins and losses. throughout the years i have managed to emerge as a leader. i have earned myself respect for how i act on the court but also how i act off the court. i feel that these are more important than  my win-loss record. in my eyes, even though we lost four in a row, i am still a winner. i have followed my heart to do something i love and i never gave up. regardless if i only have 11 games left of my competitive basketball career... i will take all that i learned to my next team, whether it be in the work force or in a family.